Many guys get shy and face timidity when approaching a girl. These guys are usually not socially awkward or shy around other men, but when it comes to going up to a girl and talking to her, they’ll freeze up and not know what to say. Most of the time, they will back off and miss out on meeting what could be a really great girl. This article will detail and discuss how to avoid facing timidity when approaching a girl.

Girls in our society often grow up watching princess movies and reading fairytale books. They grow up with the belief that girls are supposed to wait around for their ‘prince’ to come to them, and make her fall madly in love with him. For at least the last few centuries, girls have also been socialized in such a way that in our society, if a girl approaches a guy to ask him out, it very likely implies that she has been with numerous men before, is bold and assertive. Many girls do not want to seem this way, so they simply flaunt themselves around and wait for a great guy to approach them.

Girls often love a guy who is somewhat confident. At least confident enough to approach her, give her a nice compliment, and ask her out. They mostly want guys that everybody likes and all the girls want, and the most popular guys tend to be confident. Even if you don’t feel confident, acting like you are can make others believe you are. You don’t have to feel timid when approaching a girl. The most important thing is to keep in mind that girls like to be complimented on something genuine. Telling her something like she has beautiful eyes, a gorgeous smile, great hair, or a cute nose, will make her happy no matter who you are.

One of the most important things you can do is keep in mind that when you approach this girl, you are probably going to make her day. Many guys seem to think that by approaching a girl, they will screw up and say something dumb. Does it really matter if you don’t say exactly what you planned? Think about the worst thing that might happen. Perhaps, she will say “no thank you” after asking her out.

Maybe she will give a reason like she has a boyfriend, in which case, a nice girl would likely apologize. Either way, all you are doing is walking up to a pretty girl and giving her a nice, sincere compliment. You will be making her day, or at least be making her smile.

Don’t feel bad if she says “no” after asking her out. After all, this just gave you some practice to try on somebody else. In time, you will see how much easier it will get to approach girls without facing timidity. And, because of your actions, you will eventually end up on a date with a girl of your choice.

The online project Good Health Today congregates articles of specialists in health in order to give you the best advice in this important area of life. See more at www.goodhealthtoday.net.
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[tags]timidity, girl, woman, men[/tags]

Without the universe (IT) there is nothing for the (I) to experience. The (I) would be floating in awareness, observing a timeless awareness - aware of nothing else. If there was no (I) would the (IT) even exist? If the universe is really just fluctuating energy waves it is our brain that converts them into observable, experiential matter. Without the observing (I) these universal energy states are nothingness (which is still really something!).

The universe (IT) is a series of complex relationships (ITS) from the very tiny to the very large. Vibrating waves in other dimensions (according to string theory) form neutrons, protons and electrons. Neutrons, protons and electrons form atoms. Atoms form elements that make up the physical universe as well as life in the form of molecules that form DNA chains. The DNA has the intelligence or inherent knowing of life creation. The (presumed to be unconscious) elements of the universe come together to form a profound new living reality within it; the observing energy of the universe (I). The observer that must have been there all along comes to life. Together the (I) and the (IT) form an experience of observer and observed; the (I) reality within the (IT) reality.

Out of the (I) the observing energy gains a sense for ‘me’ or my body or my things; individual perception is born.

When you bring together more than one (I) it creates a social (WE) reality. Individuals experiencing thoughts and feelings need some way to communicate desires or dangers and so a technology known as language is born.

With language it’s now possible to communicate more efficiently with the self and so a deeper inner reality evolves; logic is born. As the inner reality evolves so to does the need to communicate it. This process creates a loop between deepening social relationships and deepening individual relationships. Humans become the most dominant species on Earth not through strength but intelligence as a result of their joint social (WE) and (I) reality evolution. As these groups of (I) grow in intelligence they form tribes which become complex societies, as they work together and form specialized labor groups and organizations a new reality known as culture or civilization.

Civilization is now on the brink of a new reality, one in which technology merges with the individual and the borders of ‘me’ and ‘my’ become fused in the virtual domain with others. The boundaries of the old individual nervous system begin to melt away as individual consciousness and communication begins to overlap in space. There may still be a sense of individuality as long as there is a physical body but the virtual domain is evolving its own state of consciousness which will become most evident when emotion and logic is duplicated in technology. What is ‘I’ but a field of organized sensory perceptions? What does ‘I’ become when those sensory perceptions overlap with other fields? It becomes one ‘I’

Of course the potential for all four realities existed before they came together in the physical domain so the question is for the sake of experience does the individual ‘I’ fragment itself again or evolve into something higher that we cannot grasp?

James Rick Stinson is founder of FullPotential.com - A Global Community for Positive Change, with hundreds of free videos and articles on cutting edge personal development. For the latest visit FullPotential.com and join the community today.

[tags]communication, civilization, new reality[/tags]

Conflict - even the word can make your stomach tighten into knots. If there’s conflict around you, whether it directly involves you or not, you may not be able to do your best work. If the conflict is on a personal level, it can affect your home life as well as what happens on the job.

Effective conflict resolution is a skill that everyone can benefit from learning.

Most conflict occurs because someone doesn’t respond to another’s actions in the expected manner. There may be differences of opinion, or a need is not being met. Despite attempts to avoid a conflict, it may not always be possible.

When conflict occurs, here are some proven techniques you can use to help you diffuse the conflict and find a resolution:

Diffusing the Conflict

1. Break the tension. Do something completely out of character to break the tension. Laughter can go a long way toward diffusing conflict.

Don’t expect it to solve the whole problem. However, it will give you a chance to take a break from the anger so you can gather your thoughts, cool down, and begin to work toward a solution.

2. Adhere to company policy. If the problem is at work, refer to company policy. While a company may not consider every possible issue in their handbook, it may address many common problems. Using the company policy as a guideline prevents claims of favoritism.

3. Act quickly. If at all possible, avoid putting off the conflict for a more convenient time. Allowing conflict and ill feelings to remain will only serve to make your office or home stressful. It’s best to deal with it immediately.

Finding a Resolution

1. Identify the problem. This is the first step to resolving a conflict effectively. You’re not likely to solve a problem if you have no idea what it is. To determine what the problem is, talk calmly and listen to each other without judgment.

2. State your needs. It’s quite possible the person who’s angry doesn’t really know what the problem is. Each person should write down any needs that aren’t being met.

Do they expect a raise they haven’t received? Maybe they’re not getting enough sleep. Are they dealing with a long-term illness in their family? Voicing their needs may reduce some of their anger.

3. Clarify your understanding. Once the problem is identified, it’s time to start communicating with the “drive through” method:

* One person describes their side of the issue and expresses their feelings.
* The other person repeats back to them what they understood of their description.
* Then the first person may add more information, explanation, or clarification.
* When the first person has said everything they need to say, it’s the other person’s turn.
* They repeat the process with the second person describing their side of the issue.

4. Find a solution. Now that you know what’s bothering the other, you can work on resolving the conflict. It’s planning time. Ask the following questions:

* What can be done so that both people are satisfied with the outcome?
* How can we work together to fix this problem?
* If we cannot resolve the issue right away, what can we do to work toward a resolution?

When both people are more intent on finding a solution rather than arguing or fighting, you’re more likely to find a solution both can be comfortable with.

5. Follow through. Be sure to follow through with the steps necessary to solve the initial problem.

If the plan is not adhered to as agreed upon, you take a chance of the old problem reappearing. You also increase the possibility of one person feeling like they were just being placated.

Conflict resolution is tricky business. The key is in diffusing conflict effectively and quickly. The sooner the conflict is diffused, the sooner you can work on a resolution that is a win-win proposition for everyone involved.

Maurice Castle first learned about Oneness and deeksha from the Oneness University in Fiji. Oneness helps improve your relationships in life- learn more at http://OnenessBlessingFiji.com

[tags]oneness university, oneness, deeksha[/tags]

So, it is your first day at your new job and you don’t really know what to expect. You have been to the office before but only briefly at the interview and have got a first impression about the company. But, how much do you really know about the office etiquette and how you are expected to behave? Well, there are some simple rules and guidelines to abide by so that you will take to your new workplace like a duck to water.

The basic behaviours that will be expected of a new starter are those that the current office will already practise. Adhering to the dress code will be demanded so ensure you know if the company encourages suit-wearing or smart casual as this will make you feel comfortable and prevent an embarrassing first day. It will feel awkward if you arrive for work in a three-piece suit to find your peers and boss in jeans and trainers or vice versa.

As a new starter you will be expected to adapt to the office environment that you are joining. Don’t think that you can just impose your personality on the workplace as this can appear as arrogance and may alienate you from certain members, if not all, of the office. Take your time when you start to monitor the other workers and get an understanding of how they work, speak and behave. Doing this will enable you to become a part of the office hierarchy as you smoothly integrate into the group.

Many of your actions should be based upon those of the existing workforce. However, this doesn’t mean that you should act sheepish and introverted and become an office clone. There may be various traditions that are followed so try to make yourself aware of these early on so you don’t offend people when you flout these rules. An example of this could be communal tea runs, when the single cup-of-tea maker will be victim to whispers and gossip-mongering.

Don’t be afraid to be yourself as it will enable your new workmates to get to know you right from the start. Setting the tone and conveying your personality is an important part of making an impression, so do it in the right way and you will be a popular figure in no time at all.

Respect is one of the cornerstones of a happy office so treat others with respect or risk becoming an eternal outcast. Talking over people, making personal calls and telling offensive jokes are all ways of making you disliked with little chance of reconciliation. First impressions are so important so be aware that your new office will be scrutinised everything that you do in order to gauge a quick evaluation of what you’re about.

Your first day is likely to involve a lot of meeting new people, so ensure you sleep well the night before. Yawning or appearing disinterested and vacant when you are being shown around is not going to set you in good stead for your new career. Listen carefully to any important information and don’t be afraid to ask questions when you don’t understand. It will let your boss know that you are listening and that you are keen to learn.

The key to becoming a fully-integrated member of your new workplace is simply to listen and observe to your new workmates. You will be spending more time with them than you will with your family so take the time to get to know their quirks and beliefs. You will not want to seem invisible but you will also need to avoid standing out from the crowd for the wrong reasons. It will be hard to convince people that their first impressions were wrong.

Starting you rnew job is an intimidating time for any person, but try not to be too nervous as this may affect your behaviour negatively. Be confident, without appearing arrogant, and get to know your new peers during breaks and conversations as this will further improve your chances of enjoying a happy working life. The new office could be your workplace for a very long time so it makes sense to make the effort to fit in without irritating too many people.

Patrick is an expert Research and Travel consultant. His current interest is in Heathrow Parking, Hilton Heathrow and Luton Airport Parking.

[tags]office etiquette, office behaviour, first day, new job, office, work[/tags]

Clear thinking is crucial for carrying on a conversation, making decisions, and practically everything we do. Thinking can be clouded by a host of conditions including stress, dehydration, and poor nutrition. Now, studies reveal that rejection and criticism have a significant influence on how well a person thinks.

In a series of experiments at Case Western Reserve University in Cleveland, participants were exposed to a series of situations that resulted in manufactured rejections. They were given before and after intelligence and analytical skill tests. The researchers were amazed to learn that the intelligence scores plummeted by 25% on average. Their analytical reasoning skills declined an average of 30%.

We are born with the fear of abandonment. As humans, one of the most powerful drives we have is to connect, and be accepted. When rejected, some people’s self-esteem tends to become unstable. A person’s self-esteem is forged in the first seven or eight years of life. Low self-esteem is fostered in an atmosphere of conditional love. It robs an individual of the psychological defenses needed to ward off the slings and arrows of life.

One of the most vital responsibilities of a parent is to cultivate a robust self-esteem in their children. It is unconditional love that nurtures healthy self-esteem. So equipped, an individual can brush aside the occasional rejection that is bound to occur.

During research at Montreal’s McGill University, social psychologists found that people under stress tend to pay more attention to frowning faces than smiling faces. Like the Law of Attraction suggests, whatever you put your energy, focus, and attention on, you will attract more of. A person’s depressed mood will filter out positive situations, and cause more focus on social threats like rejections and criticisms. These in turn will feed muddled thinking. This downward spiral can be reversed through intervention.

The McGill researchers tested telemarketers, a group that experiences a fair amount of rejection. Participants were exposed to a series of video games that exposed them to either smiling faces or flowers. After just one week, those who played the smile game had 17 percent less of the stress hormone cortisol in their system, and a 68 percent increase in sales!

Since emotions are linked to survival, they have neurological message priority. Simply stated, negative emotions can inhibit cognition, memory, and generally fracture human wholeness. In his book, Walsh outlines several methods people can employ to change their destructive patterns so that they focus more on positive stimuli.

International speaker, Dr. Brian E. Walsh is the author of the bestseller Unleashing Your Brilliance and has also co-authored with John Gray and Jack Canfield the self-help book, 101 Great Ways to Improve Your Life: Volume 2. http://www.UnleashingBrilliance.com

[tags]confidence,thinking,cognition,communicating,family,career,ADD,focus,concentration,interpersonal[/tags]

A celebrity is the term used to describe someone who is famous and attracts attention from the general public and the world’s media. Traditionally, a celebrity would gain the title by his or her work or achievements in a particular field of expertise. Actors, musicians, politicians and inventors have all become celebrities in the past. However, as we fall deeper and deeper into the cesspool of the 21st century a new celebrity has arrived - the nobody.

Cultural commentator Daniel Boorstin stated in his 1961 book, The Image: A Guide to Pseudo-Events in America, that a celebrity was “a person who is known for his well-knownness”. Nearly fifty years later and his theories of pseudo-events are still as apt today with the current trends of reality TV and celebrity culture. So where did we go wrong, and when did it become so easy to become famous?

In 1968, prominent artist Andy Warhol commented on the state of society and its infatuation with celebrity when he exclaimed that ‘everyone will be world-famous for fifteen minutes.’ This brave claim may have seemed a little misguided but the previous forty years have proved his point emphatically. However, I think he may have been a bit ambitious with the length of time as some stars of reality TV arrive and disappear in the blink of an eye.

So we arrive in 2008 with the words of both Warhol and Boorstin ringing in our ears. We sit down, we turn on the TV to see what audio-visual treats await - every channel fills our living rooms with ‘real people’ doing ‘real things’. As you peruse the glossy TV magazines notice the amounts of reality shows that now dominate our screens - Wife Swap, X-Factor, American Idol, Britain’s Got Talent and the reality pioneer Big Brother. The concept itself of Big Brother is everything that Boorstin and Warhol warned us about, ‘normal’ people are thrust into the limelight to be mocked, glorified, vilified and humiliated in equal measures. And we lap it up.

Since Big Brother first hit the UK’s screens in the summer of 2000, there have been nine series (including the current one) and nine winners. The ‘housemate’ that is eventually voted BB Winner 2000 and whatever is not necessarily the most likely to gain fame and fortune from their appearance on this cultural phenomenon. The champion of Big Brother earnings so far with estimated earnings of three million pounds, entered the house in 2002, finishing a lowly 4th before embarking on a successful career in television, fitness DVDs and perfume. Jade Goody is the epitome of the pop-culture phenomenon that the UK will continue to see if reality television continues to dominate the ratings.

To achieve the financial security and national fame that Goody now possesses, she had to perform some pretty embarrassing acts while on BB3, as it was often called. The immature 21 year old was constantly belittled by her housemates and embarrassed herself with her apparent lack of basic intelligence and knowledge. Goody was famous for misinformed comments including ‘Do they speak Portuganese in Portugal? I thought Portugal was in Spain’ and ‘I knew Lynne was from Aberdeen but I didn’t realise Aberdeen was in Scotland’. Stupidity and a lack of pride had quickly become Jade Goody’s most profitable asset, and she was set to milk it for all its worth.

Goody reentered the Big Brother House in 2007, but this time as a fully-fledged celebrity in the show’s spin-off Celebrity Big Brother. She had grown into a national treasure in some people’s eyes, a real story of rags to riches, a modern day fairytale. Goody’s decision to take part damaged her reputation immeasurably as she became the centre of a racism row amidst comments made about Bollywood star Shilpa Shetty.

Goody’s career appeared to be coming to an end as her perfume was withdrawn from certain shops and her public perfection had reached its lowest point. As Boorstin and Warhol hinted towards, the public’s attention span continues to dwindle allowing Goody to regain her place on the celebrity merry-go-round. Voted third most pointless celebrity behind Paris Hilton and Chantelle Houghton (?), Goody has announced the launch of a second perfume as well as a re-release of her autobiography in 2008 so we can expect to see even more of this pseudo-event for many years to come. Fifteen minutes of fame? If only.

Patrick is an expert Research and Travel consultant. His current interest include Luton Airparks, Luton Airport Parking and I have a travel blog site.

[tags]celebrity culture, jade goody, pop culture, big brother, andy warhol, fame, famous[/tags]

Many Chinese customs are centered around the belief in the power of certain numbers, and the superstitions surrounding digits in Chinese culture only takes second fiddle to the role of specific foods. The pronunciation of these numbers also reflects the Chinese’s affinity with homonyms, where many digits are considered lucky or unlucky based on words that sound similar. This in turn, affects the entire Chinese economy, since folks here will not buy anything without careful consideration of the numerals involved.

Because of the auspiciousness of certain numbers, Chinese will often pay large sums for phone numbers, street addresses, residence floors, driver’s license numbers, license plate numbers and bank account digits. For example, a personal license plate with the number eight can cost millions of dollars.

Lucky Numbers

The number 2 (ar in phonetic English) is a positive number to Chinese people. There’s a Chinese saying: “Good things come in pairs.” It’s common throughout the Middle Kingdom to see double symbols in product brand names, which means double happiness and double value. When Chinese exchange oranges during the Lunar New Year, they exchange two, four, or eight at a time.

The number 6, pronounced leo, sounds like the word used for “slippery,” which implies that everything will go smoothly. 666 is considered one of the luckiest numbers of all; it’s displayed prominently in shop windows across the entire country, and people often pay extra to get a mobile phone number including this string of digits. In Guangzhou, a motorcycle license plate numbered AW666 was sold for 270,000. RMB, (roughly $34,000. USD)!

The number 8 in Mandarin is pronounced bah, which sounds similar to fah, meaning prosperity and good fortune. If you’ve been to China, you’ve probably noticed the unusual frequency of this esteemed digit used in the phone numbers of hotels, airlines and most major businesses. Telecommunication companies and car registration authorities charge extra for each number 8. For example, the Holiday Inn Crowne Plaza in Shanghai has the phone number 6252-8888. Northwest Airline’s number is 6279-8088; China Travel Services is 6247-8888.

In Chengdu, China, the telephone number 8888-8888 was sold for $270,000. USD. The Summer Olympics in Beijing are scheduled to open 8/8/08, at 8 P.M.

The number 9, pronounce jeo, is also a homonym for the word “everlasting.” To the Chinese, it signifies friendship, love, and long life.

The Unluckiest Number

Number 4 (sih) sounds like the word “death,” and is therefore considered a bad omen. Many numbered product lines skip the 4, e.g. Nokia cell phones do not have a series beginning with a 4, and most residential buildings skip all numbers with 4, e.g. 4, 14, 24, 34, and 40 - 49 floors. The airlines, trains and buses all bypass this unfortunate number.

Number 14, pronounced shir sih, sounds like “ten die.” But it can also be said as ee sih, literally “one-four.” Another common way to say one, is yaow. Thus, 14 can be said as yaow sih, literally meaning: “want to die.” Not a favorite!

Lastly, research has revealed that more Chinese are likely to die from heart attacks or heart disease on the fourth of the month, obviously due to the superstition related stress evoked by the unlucky number, which in turn, triggers cardiac deaths.

Well, I’ve covered the basics in lucky and unlucky numbers, but like most things in China, numbers and their meanings are extremely deep-rooted, with many nuances and complexities involved. Consider this a quick crash course. Chinese numerology dates back to the first century A.D. when Emperor Fu His discovered a tortoise shell said to contain a magic number square, which led to the development of I Ching, Feng Shui, Nine Star Ki, geomancy, and Chinese astrology and numerology. Volumes could be written on the subject, and I’ll leave that to the mystics and academies.

Timothy Green is the co-author of SPEAK E-Z CHINESE In Phonetic English. You can find fun and easy Mandarin lessons, as well as travel and culture tips about China at The Cathay Cafe.

[tags]Mandarin numbers, Chinese numerology, Chinese culture, Speaking Chinese, Speaking Mandarin,[/tags]